If you want your goals as a couple to be realistic and manageable, start with small goals. Organizing them into the months of the year can be helpful and fun. Ready for a new year as a couple?
January: Do not expect perfection
A couple's goals may be unrealistic or difficult to achieve. The achievement can end up determining the valuation of the relationship.
It is well if we set realistic goals, if we do not achieve them, we accept our mistakes and try to learn from them without punishing ourselves or becoming obsessed, valuing the experience to improve the relationship.
Don't get overwhelmed trying to build your strange perfection. Your routines, schedules, and plans may not be the ones you are supposed to have, but they belong to you. Make sure you live a satisfying life for the two of you and not one set up by others.
February: Share a list of each other's triggers to avoid fights
Even if you spend a lot of time with your partner, it is hard to know all the uncomfortable things. Even knowing most of the things your partner dislikes, can sometimes be forgotten. Each writes your list of triggers, blind spots, or bad-communication habits that screw up the relationship. Share the lists for both of you to read frequently and avoid "stepping on landmines". Knowing both triggers starts to improve communication as a couple.
March: Let each other evolve.
Allow each other to devote more time to your careers or personal projects. Allowing each other more space in the first trimester to focus on tasks is helpful for the couple. Each of you will be more focused on the priorities then you will be able to share quality time.
April: Have tech-free time together.
Set a time a day, or at least a week, to be together without a screen. It can be indoors or in an outdoor activity. Spending time together forced to separate from technology may feel weird the first few times, but it is an effective therapy for reconnecting emotionally.
May: Join the gym together.
To explain the benefits of this would be to repeat too much. Do it, you deserve it.
June: Only commit to what is doable
July: Support each other’s healing.
Both you and your partner have lived through various personal experience you have to overcome. Healing your emotions and freeing yourself from your backpack of shortcomings, anger, and frustrations is a more difficult task alone. Doing it together allows you to establish healthy, empathic, and balanced bonds as a couple. A healthy couple is one in which both parties work to free themselves from their emotional damage and support each other process.
August: Plan a trip
A trip together to any destination is a must for every couple. You will never get to know someone until you spend a few days away from home together.
September: Listen without reacting
When we argue with our partner, we react almost as a reflex. We rarely listen awareness, because the ego interferes. Actually, we are reacting to ourselves, to our own ideas, to the perceptions we have. Cultivate the art of listening. Because this is not one that all couples master.
October. Communicate calmly and honestly
Trust with your partner allows you to communicate honestly and directly. But sometimes, we are not entirely respectful or empathetic in speaking to our partner. Make it a point to have more conversations in which both of you are totally direct and honest, with loving compassion.
November. Find some mutual friends.
A strategy to strengthen your connection is to meet new people together. Make it a point to connect with a group of people who know you as a couple. It is healing to have your love appreciated and acknowledged.
December: Show gratitude for each other
Say something to thank your partner for every day, even on the hardest days. It may seem like a weird habit initially, but give it time. The practice of saying thank you for the little things makes your partner feel valued.